(No Ratings Yet)The epic Dr. Syntax’s Part 2 of his jokes track “Subcultures (Part 1)”. 4 years on, how have subcultures changed? Will Synners fit in? Will he still frolick on…
DR. SYNTAX
- Let’s go.
- Yo! Wow! Sinners!
- Shouts to Dag Nabbit.
- Benny Huge! I’m back!
- And I still haven’t got any friends…
- Or new ideas apparently.
- Never mind.
- Check it…
- I tried to act sociable with the guys down the local,
- But soon realized that was still a tad hopeful,
- Muggins here bought them all lager and crisps,
- They went to smoke and left me looking after the drinks.
- I tagged along with a gang of vagabonds,
- A proper chav-a-thon; they all thought I was a massive ponce.
- Half of those lads had been slapped with ASBOs,
- While the other half spent the week sat in Ladbrokes.
- I started chilling with some hippy types,
- In an eco-village that’s a little like a building site,
- I found out they’re all posh kids in disguise,
- And all stay with Mummy back in Surrey when it’s Christmas time.
- I tried to get friendly with some trendies,
- To my surprise their whole style didn’t offend me,
- After going through all that hardship at school, this year it turns out wearing glasses is cool.
- I started chilling with some ex-garage ravers,
- Who used to get their nights shut down because of bad behaviour,
- Nowadays they make watered-down grime/pop,
- And all of them are sickeningly rich while I’m not.
- I met some UK Hip Hop heads on the Internet,
- Thinking, “Yes!” This is where I’ll still be getting big respect,
- I asked them if they liked Syntax, Stig and Jehst,
- They said, “’Low those neeks” Now we like Giggs and Ghetts.
- I started chilling with some Indie kids,
- Their band was getting really big after learning 3 simple riffs,
- They got signed after hardly any practice, now I’m thinking maybe Oasis weren’t that shit.
- I met some artists who thought that they were special and incredibly edgy,
- Because they were off to paint with stencils,
- How ironic! They were so pompous that I ended up shouting, “Get a job you tossers!”
- And then I met some footy hooligans,
- Who treated kick-off in the match like a mission to Jerusalem,
- I wish I had a new joke to make fools of them,
- But basically they’re still cunts and somebody should neuter them.
- I met some lads who had recently outed,
- At first I had a bad feeling about it,
- What a night! We’ve got some dope photos,
- The lads showed me a great time – no homo!
- I met some nasty girls who looked like Barbie dolls,
- Who wouldn’t shut the fuck up about Cheryl Cole,
- One threw a fit full of poisonous venom,
- Then she went and kicked the shit out of the toilet attendant,
- I met a couple into S&M,
- Nothing they ever say would make me want to have sex with them,
- The guy said, “Alright, but keep quiet for Pete’s sake”
- “Now I’m back in government, the press would have a field day”.
- At this point I thought I needed help,
- I mean, there’s got to be a problem if I’ve bothered to repeat myself,
- I told them all, “Fine, do what you like to”,
- “Just make sure you buy the Benny Huge album on iTunes!”
- Or BandCamp, yes, preferably BandCamp.
- Or just send me a message or something on Myspace,
- Or whatever the kids are into.
- I’m an approachable guy; I’m friendly.
- We can make a deal.
- Don’t just nick it though, that’d be a bit shit.
- Thanks.
- Some Hip Hop shit y’all.
- Sinners!
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